This is Ranger. The horse.
I am in jail this morning.
Yesterday, the mares got their tails washed for the "4th of July Parade", what ever that is. When they got back to the corral, their tails smelled funny. Jesse, (That Mare) said I could not smell her tail. I understood her pretty completely, so I tried to smell Estes' (The Other Mare's) tail. She kicked me. HARD. And when I tried to smell her tail again, she kicked me AGAIN.
That will not do.
So I chased her biting her back and rear for a while. She ran away FAST so I had to chase her up and down the hill.
"Ranger, stop that"
I chased her up...
"Ranger, pay attention to me. Stop that now!"
I chased her down...
"Ranger, you moron, quit it!"
I chased her all around. Both of the white ones ran around acting crazy, too.
"RANGER. PAY ATTENTION TO ME NOW."
Oh my. Suddenly Beel appeared out of NOWHERE and was VERY BIG.
"RANGER. STOP BEING A JERK."
He was swinging a dead snake over his head and talking loud and hard, like a barking dog. I stopped chasing the other mare and ran and hid behind a tree next to the white horses. Those horses BOTH ran away when Beel stomped up. I tried to hide behind the tree, but Beel got to me anyway and threw the dead snake over my neck. Oh... it was just a lead rope.
Beel took me to the guest horse pen and made me work and do things and pay attention to him. I hate that, but I was kinda scared, so I was VERY good. Then Beel sayed "I'll be right back". and he leaved. He came back with smelly stuff on his hands.
"This is the hair conditioner that you can't seem to get enough of, you moron." Beel sayed.
Then he put stinky stuff on my tail, on my shoulders and on MY NOSE.
Now I have spended all dark by myself in jail in the guest pen smelling funny.
It is kinda nice not having any of those other horses bugging me though.
And I can see the parade from here.
Ranger. The horse.