Bill and Juanita, owners of Allenspark Lodge B&B, are living their dream...

running a successful business and riding as often as possible.

Sunday, August 12, 2012


B-  Hey Ranger.  Your front feet are getting kinda long.  Let's give you a quick file job.

R-  Okay, Beel.

B-  Foot.   (file-scrape-file-scrape-file)  Down. (foot drops)
B-  Foot.   (file-scrape-file-scrape-file)  Down. (foot drops)

B-  Alrighty then buddy, that's a little better.  Let's get a nice "mustang roll" filed on the front of these two and call it good.  Put your foot up here on this stump.

R- Okay Beel.

B-   Foot.  (move stump under foot)  Down.  (file-buff-file)
B-   Foot.  (move stump from under foot)  Down.  Good.

B-  Now, let's get the other one.

R-   No.

B-   Foot.

R-   No.

B-   Ranger, pay attention.  I said "Foot".

R-   Beel, pay attention. I sayed "No".

B-   Come on buddy,  we're almost done.  Foot.

R-   No.

B-  What's wrong with you horse?  You were perfect with the other foot, and now you're being a turd.  PUT YOUR FOOT ON THE STUMP!

R-  No.  I have tried it and did not like it.  It felt funny.


R-   No.

B-   (grunt)!  (huff) (puff)

B-   FOOT!

R-   Nope.   Will not do it.


R-   Waneeta has her camera.

B-   Jerk.
B-   Okay, no stump.  I'll just hold it up and work on it.

R-   Okay.

B-   Foot.   (file-buff-file-slip-cuss-file-cuss-slip-buff)  Down.

R-   (nose fist bump)  Say Beel,  you are blooding.

B-   It's a new, and very good file you jerk.  I'm not sure that finger has any prints left on it.

R-   You blodded on your forehead, Beel.

B-   I'll be right back you moron.
B-   Okay, let's get you home.

R-   Feels good Beel.  Can we go for a ride on the next day?

B-   Sounds good to me buddy.  Eat your dinner and I'll see you tomorrow.


  1. So, who actually won that round? I'm kinda confused.

    Or is it like when Nebalee and I fight and tell each other to eff off and then call back in ten minutes to make plans for lunch?

    1. I guess I'd call it a draw. I finished the trim, but he did NOT put his other foot on the stump.


  2. :D This is one of the reasons we should all quite this crazy horse stuff and ride dirt bikes. Dirt bikes don't form opinions when you're trying to change their oil!

    1. And you don't have to feed them unless you actually ride them and they hardly ever wander out of the garage at night and...


    2. And they don't spook and they don't grow hair in winter and then dump it all over you in spring and they don't get upset when you take them away from their buddies and....

      But they also won't find the way home if you get lost in a park :)

  3. It's a simple mathematical formula.

    Mass + weight x stubborn factor is substantially greater than the desire or ability to do the job.

  4. Oh Bill, I love starting my day with y'all.

  5. Hahahahaha! You can lead a horse to a stump....


  6. LMAO> I spit my coffee all over Beel. Hope that wiped the blood off. Love The Ranger.And you did a good job, Beel.


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