Bill and Juanita, owners of Allenspark Lodge B&B, are living their dream...

running a successful business and riding as often as possible.

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Hay There

B-  Hiya Ranger!

R-  Hello Beel.

B-  What's my horse up to today?

R-  I am still about fourteen of the hands.  Just like always Beel.

B-  No, I mean... never mind.  I've had a pretty busy few days here.  Sorry I haven't been around to bug you much.

R-  That is good Beel.

B-  A couple days ago I went down the mountain to buy some hay.

R-  My hay?

B-  Yeah.  I split a load with our oldest daughter.  It was 99-101 degrees while we were loading a ton of hay onto my truck and another ton onto their trailer.  Hot-hot-hot.  As I pulled away I was glad the truck has a working air conditioner.  But as I drove along, it didn't seem to be cooling off any.  In fact, I was getting hotter and hotter and HOTTER  and then-  SATAN'S SKILLET! MY ARSE IS ON FIRE!!!

R-  Beel?

B-  I really hate it when those stupid heated leather seats get turned on by accident.  It can ruin your...

R-  Beel!

B-  Yeah Buddy?

R-  Was my hay okay?

B-  Yeah, but some of the bales were kinda soft and the load kept shifting.  In fact, our daughter lost about 20% of their load on a "round-about" in one of the small towns on her way home.  Fifteen bales hit...

R-  But my hay is okay Beel?

B-  Yeah, I just had to tighten the straps a couple times more than usual.  So just when I got up the mountain with the hay, a lady from a near by town showed up at the lodge saying her car had broken down across the street and Juanita asked if I could give her a ride home.

R-  Did you take my hay?

B-  No Ranger, the truck stayed home and I took the minivan.  After I dropped her at her home, I started back to the lodge, when I saw another car broken down beside the highway.  I offered the 2 gals in the car a ride back to the lodge so they could call a towing service.  When I got back to the lodge, it looked like it was going to rain  before I could unload the hay, so I...

R-  Did my hay get wet?

B-  No, our grandson and I tarped the hay before we took the gals back to their broken car.  Their car only had 700 miles on it.  This was its' break-in trip.  Break down trip is more like it.  When we got home the grandson and I unloaded and stacked the hay.

R-  So my hay is put away?

B-  Put up just fine, Ranger.  The next day Juanita and I went into town to visit her mom, play with our daughters horse "Skeeter", and buy the weeks' groceries and some parts for a plumbing project.  We got home, unloaded the food, and then I stayed up late replacing a water heater that had started leaking.  You know, it drives me kinda nuts when I call them "hot water heaters".  They are "cold water heaters" and I guess it's just a pet...

R-  It did not leak on my hay?

B-  No, we don't keep your hay in the kitchen, even though it's food.  So it was after midnight when I finally turned the hot water heater... crap... water heater on and went to bed.  A little after 5:am this morning, the hiking guide staying with us knocked on our bedroom door and said it looked like a bear had gotten into our van and dug some stuff out of it.

R-  Beel.

B-  I guess we hadn't fully closed the slider door on the van after unloading the groceries and the bear had climbed in and snooped around for something to eat.

R-  Beel.

B-  Yes Buddy?

R-  Did the bear get my hay?

B-  Naw,  we don't keep any food in the van over night in hopes of keeping the bears out of it.  I do think he got a couple antacids though.

R-   Okay Beel my hay got loaded and did not burn up or fall in the road or get rained on or break down or get wet or get eaten by a bear.  WHERE IS MY HAY BEEL?

B-  Oh yeah, huh.  It's dinner time, isn't it.  Sorry, I guess I got kinda wrapped up in my story.

R-  It was a good story Beel.  I really liked the part about my hay.


  1. Cracking up. Except for the part about the bear.

    I love you Ranger. Beel is a good hay-giver.

  2. LMAO. I love Ranger's humor. Beel is funny, too. Bear in mind, you should always keep your vehicle doors closed and food contained safely.

  3. Too funny!! Except the part about the bear. No, actually, that made me laugh, too.


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